Sentence of the Week

From "Enoch and the Gorilla" by Flannery O'Conner, we have one of the funniest action sequences in the English language, in which the main character dons a stolen gorilla suit while hiding out naked in the forest:

In the uncertain light, one of his lean white legs could be seen to disappear and then the other, one arm and then the other: a black heavier shaggier figure replaced his. For an instant, it had two heads, one light and one dark, but after a second, it pulled the dark back head over the other and corrected this. It busied itself with certain hidden fastenings and what appeared to be minor adjustments of its hide.

A few fine points. The perspective is introduced to us in the passive voice, something rookie writers are warned not to do. But O'Connor shows us here that the banning of the passive voice is pure hogwash; we have "one of his lean white legs could be seen" introducing the description. This is O'Connor gently pushing a preposterous scene out to the reader instead of forcing it as the active voice might, much as a comedian may deliver a punchline -- this is how it is, I lay no claim to it. It heightens the humor, emphasizing the difference between outright slapstick (active voice) and a deadpan observation (passive) simply laid out for the audience to figure out.

I also like the phrase "black heavier shaggier figure," which might be properly punctuated with commas to read "a black, heavier, shaggier figure" by a lesser writer. Removing the commas makes the phrase move faster, making it feel more disordered and rushed, adding to the strangeness of the scene.

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